 Photo by Tima Miroshnichenko “Lord, keep me in the moment. Help me live with my eyes wide open. `Cause I don't wanna miss what you have for me. ~ Jeremy Camp I found myself crying in Mcdonald's last week. It was supposed be just like any other coffee run. I had my code in hand. I was ready to get my points and about to get on the road for a fun weekend getaway with my husband. As I approached the counter, everything changed, however. You see the "customers" right in front of me couldn't help but get my undivided attention. There they were, the most adorable brother and sister duo, proudly placing their order for "2 waters." Their beautiful mom was beaming, watching them closely, and protectively from the side. They had their meal but wanted to order something on their own. Instantly I was swept back in time and there Tyler, age 7, and Shannon, age 5, stood in front of me. They even resembled them. It was uncanny. A wave of nostalgia and sadness engulfed me. The tears unexpectedly flowed behind my dark sunglasses. I had a moment that my mom often described as an "I miss my little people" moment. Have you ever experienced this? I am sure I am not alone. My kids are adults now. They are 28 and 26. Despite my mistakes along the way, they are two of the best humans out there. I am so blessed to have them in my life. Even so, there are just those moments that come up from time to time that get me right in the heart. I miss their little voices, their chubby, little hands in mine and their bedtime giggles and cuddles. Can you relate?  When Ty and Shannon were a baby and toddler, I wrote a poem which was entitled “Someday.” It was my first publication, and I was so proud. In this raw and honest poem, I talked of all the things that annoyed me at this stage like wishing I could: get a solid night’s sleep, shower without an audience, and watch Oprah instead of Barney. I realized too however, that there was so much I would also miss about that stage as well though like: infectious baby giggles, seeing the world through a child’s eyes and bedtime prayers for Goliath and the Teletubbies. I never wanted to wish this stage away, as hard as it might have been at the time. Everyone tells you to appreciate it all and since I became a mom, I know it is so true. Kids grow up way too fast! I felt like I blinked, and now my kids are adults.  Photo by Cup of Couple There can be many tough times and circumstances that come into our lives at so many stages. Life can be just plain hard sometimes. We struggle. We wish that our circumstances would change overnight. We don't know how much more we can take at times. During the tough times I have prayed that God would step in and change my circumstances time and time again, but that is not guaranteed. I have felt like I was in the waiting room and wondering like Rapunzel from the movie Tangled, when will my life begin? Many of us struggle to "stay in the moment" because we don’t like where we are right now. Many of us are facing big struggles, challenges and heartaches. We become overwhelmed and so weary of it all. If we have an attitude of what can be learned from our current circumstances whatever they may be, we can usually see that there have been some positives that have come from these times. When you stay in the moment with your heart open, you can see them. You Got This Photo by Prateek Katyal I have been teaching for 20 years. Retirement is fast approaching. It is so easy to look ahead and wish the time away. It is a challenging career and has changed so much recently. The needs of kids are so much more complex these days and the job of a teacher is truly not what it used to be. Rather than fantasize about leaving the profession on my worst days, I am working on reframing my thoughts to focus on the here and now. Who can I encourage right now? What good can I do each day? There is still work for me to do to impact this school community. The door will close on this chapter of my life soon enough, but not just yet. I want to enjoy it and make a difference where I am, while I still can. I encourage you to do the same when possible, with whatever stage of life you are in.  Everything is for a seasonThere is a season for everything in your life. Some seasons are amazing. Woo-hoo! You are overflowing with joy and fulfillment. This may be you. Some seasons are stressful, very difficult and we wonder how we can even get out of bed. This may be you. Please know that these times of hardship will not last and with God, his mercies are new every morning. He will give you the strength you need to make it through even your darkest of days. Whether something is an ordeal or adventure is up to you. We can so easily wish times away, but I encourage you to ask God to keep you in the moment. It is in some of our hardest times, that God reveals himself the most. It may be hard to believe as well, but the very things you dread today, surprisingly may be what you end up missing the most later on. Life is funny that way. Stay strong my friend. You got this and I am standing with you. Until next time, Dana Psalms 118:24: This is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it. Little Lesson Learned: Those with open hearts see things that others miss.
Tags: patience, endurance, parenting, strength in trials, life lessonsCopyright: © 2024 littlelessonslearnedbydana, 2nd edition, 2021 first edition
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 Photo courtesy of Alyshia Bilokraly "If you want to change the world, go home and love your family." ~ Mother Teresa I can remember it vividly like it was yesterday. After a very difficult labor, emergency C-section and a week in the hospital, I was deemed “ready” to be released into the world of full-time motherhood. Terrified, my husband and I looked at each other as I was being discharged from the hospital thinking - how are they even letting us leave with our son? Don’t they see that we are nowhere near “ready?” We didn't have the first clue about what we were doing, and we were so terribly nervous. Plagued by insecurities and fears, we had no choice but to meet this challenge head on. From here on out, we had a precious little guy counting on us for absolutely everything. We had to STEP UP. I cannot lie. It was a tremendous learning curve, and it wasn’t easy, but Tyler survived and so has Shannon even though we had so much to learn and still do about this crazy rollercoaster ride called parenthood. I do not claim to have all the answers, yet through the highs and lows of this learning adventure, I have found four key things that all kids need to thrive and be successful. Somehow, I wish someone had enlightened me on this a bit sooner, yet looking at our kids today, I guess Phil and I didn’t do too bad at this parenting thing. Before we proceed, it is my pleasure to introduce you to Tyler and Shannon.
Attention Photo courtesy of Alyshia Bilokraly The first important thing that all kids need is attention. When they are babies, they obviously need constant attention to their every need, yet as they grow, they become more independent. Although they are more independent, they still need our attention, just in different ways. They want to feel that they matter and that we can put aside our busy agendas and focus on just them. It is crucial to carve out quality time with them. This time involves putting them at the forefront, so we can nurture our relationships further and let them know they are our priority. Years ago, I saw a TV commercial where a mom was headed to the beach with her family, and she got an "important" phone call. She then explained to her disappointed family that she would not be joining them, as she had to meet with a client instead. At the height of frustration, her three-year-old daughter said “Mom, when do I get to be a client?” Yikes! We all have busy lives. Work, stress and other obligations can dominate a lot of our time, yet I cannot tell you how critical it is to make time for your kids and their interests. This emphasizes to them how much they matter to you. Affection Photo courtesy of Alyshia Bilokraly The next important thing kids need is affection. Kids not only need to be shown affection through such things as meaningful touch, acts of service, or receiving gifts, but they need to hear how much we love them from our lips often. Just like with our spouse, it is not enough to think that our kids already know we love them, we need to tell them as well. The time they often most need to hear it too is when they have acted out, disobeyed or caused stress in the family. They need to know that our love for them is unconditional, and we will stand by them. My mom used to have a little gesture she would do with us that involved hand squeezing. She would often grab our hands lovingly and give them three squeezes standing for “I - love - you.” It was a creative way of showing love and I have done this with my kids as well. They too now have continued this gesture with the special people in their lives. Affirmation Photo courtesy of Alyshia Bilokraly Children need affirmation. They need to hear what it is about them that makes you crazy about them and why you appreciate them. Compliment your children often. Let them know that you are extremely proud of them and proud to call them your son or daughter. Recognize when they have used good judgment. Compliment their manners. Encourage them when they are discouraged. Help them see that mistakes in life are great learning opportunities, and you believe they have the skills to be successful in life. Let them know that they can come to you with ANYTHING and there is NO problem too big that you cannot solve together. Knowing that others believe in them is so crucial. It is often the very thing kids need to step out of the boat and take a risk. Children need to know we are in their corner and we are ready to cheer them on as their biggest fan and cheerleader. Acceptance Photo courtesy of Alyshia Bilokraly Finally, kids need unconditional acceptance. They need to know that we love them just because of who they are, not because of anything they have or have not done. In my work as a clinical social worker, I have counselled many adults who were still carrying scars from their childhood regarding acceptance issues. As kids and even into adulthood, many were constantly trying to win the approval of their parents, yet sadly always felt they fell short. When kids know they are accepted as they are, mistakes and all, they will feel free to come to us when they fail or desire some much needed advice. Kids need to know in no uncertain terms that there is NOTHING that could make us love them any less or any more. They are loved and accepted as they are, simply because they are ours.  God is the ultimate parent. He is our heavenly father. He exemplifies all these attributes with perfection. He is ready and available to empower us with his love, grace and patience to be the best parent we can be for our children. We just need to ask. You may be reading this and be feeling quite confident. You may feel like despite some mistakes along the way, you have done quite well in these areas of parenting. If that is you, that is wonderful. I applaud you and please keep up the great work. On the contrary, you may read this and feel defeated. Upon reflection, you may see your parenting skills need improvement. No judgement here. If you are feeling this way, please know there are no perfect parents out there and we all can do better in this area. It is never too late to start over with your children and to strive to be a better parent. Admitting our mistakes to our children and setting goals to do better is very liberating. Change is possible and very worthwhile. Our children and our relationships with them are one of God’s most precious gifts he has given us. So let's agree together to give our children the attention, affection, affirmation and acceptance they need and so deserve. Trust me, you will not regret it and there truly is no greater investment. From one parent to another, ~ Dana Proverbs 22:6: Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it. Little Lesson Learned: Being the best parent, you can be is one of the best goals you can set in life.  My Joy Givers: Tyler and Shannon. You have my heart forever. Love you to the moon and back. AuthorDana Romualdi is a Canadian elementary teacher, social worker, blogger, author, motivational speaker. She has a passion for helping others and spreading much-needed encouragement. She lives in Canada with her husband and two grown children. When she is not working in the classroom or blogging, she enjoys drinking coffee, watching Netflix and reading great books. Tags: parenting, parenting skills, Mother's Day, parents, affection, affirmation, acceptance, attentionCopyright: © 2024 littlelessonslearnedbydana, 2nd edition, 2014 first edition
 Photo by Tima Miroshnichenk  "Transformation in the world happens when people are healed and start investing in other people." Michael W. Smith Welcome to the second instalment of the Wise Investment series. If you haven't read the first instalment about investing in yourself, you can read it here. Today we are talking about the simple, yet powerful principle of investing in others. I was raised by exceptionally loving parents who made investing in others a way of life. In big and small ways, they would do their part to come alongside others in meaningful and practical ways. They developed a helping mindset and made a decision that they would help others every week affectionately naming their giving and generous lifestyle: Through the Roof Ministries. The name Through the Roof was based on the Bible story where friends lowered their crippled friend through the roof for him to access a healing from Jesus in a crowded home. They, like my parents believed firmly in doing what it took to get the job done and meet the needs of others. It is my honour to call them my parents and I seek daily to follow in their footsteps to the best of my ability. We can invest in others in several ways and these methods often overlap with each other. Here are some great options to consider when wanting to bless and invest in others. The Gift of Words Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash I have talked often in many blogs about the extreme power of a compliment or kind word. People are desperate for encouragement. Sometimes the word of affirmation you give could be the first that that person has heard in a very long time. It doesn't have to be an extremely deep compliment either. Consider simple statements like these: "I LOVE hanging out with you." "You are so much fun!" "You make me smile." "I am blessed to have you in my life." These small sentences when spoken at the right time, to the right person, carry BIG dividends. It does not take much to turn someone's day around. Sometimes your inspiring word, may be just the thing needed to do that. A verbal compliment, card or email can have a truly lasting impact. Little Acts of Kindness Photo by Element5 Digital on Unsplash It doesn’t take much to make someone’s day. I think we overthink it sometimes. I have struggled on occasion with whether or not I should do something for someone, at specific times, yet my mom always said “You never go wrong by being kind.” Whatever you have in your hand, you can use to bless someone else. I have a friend named Margaret who did just that. This incredible story has affectionately been deemed the pumpkin pie story and it goes like this... One October day, Margaret made one of her famous, and delicious pumpkin pies. Her family had enjoyed it immensely, but after all the dinner dishes were cleared there was still one piece left over. As she was tidying up, she considered what to do with this last piece of pie. An idea popped into her head. The idea was to deliver this piece of pie to my mom, Marilyn. Margaret was a dear friend of my mom’s and she thought she would really enjoy the pie. Margaret struggled however with this idea. Margaret is a very kind and generous person. She and I have chatted many times about the “pumpkin pie” story, and she shared she felt foolish about giving only one piece of pie to a good friend. Her desire would be to present my mom with an entire pie for the whole family to enjoy, not one little piece. Margaret felt it was insulting, yet nevertheless she could not shake this feeling that that pie slice somehow had my mom’s name on it. Margaret tells the story of how she drove up and down my mom’s street several times before she finally got the courage to go to her door with the pie. What she didn’t know was that very day my mom had been out shopping to fill a craving she had for what else, but pumpkin pie! Sadly, as it was close to Thanksgiving, there were no pumpkin pies anywhere! My dad was away on a men’s retreat and one piece was all Mom really wanted. Imagine my mom’s joy and delight when a piece of scrumptious, pumpkin pie was delivered right to her door. Margaret felt incredible too that despite her feeling a bit silly by bringing only one piece of pie, she became an agent of encouragement for a dear friend. We all agreed it was more than an idea for Margaret to deliver the pie to my mom, but instead a God-inspired prompting. What felt insignificant to her at the time, truly blessed another. Many times in life we have something we can do for others that meets their need. Nothing is insignificant when it is done with a heart of love or a desire to be a blessing. Maybe you have a trade or skill and you can offer that to help someone. Don't underestimate the power of practical help. You can be the answer to someone's prayer and that is an incredible thought to reflect upon. The Gift of Time Photo by Julia M Cameron What time can you give to bless someone else? Can you find time to volunteer at a local charity? Could you coach a little league soccer team? Could you help run a local breakfast club at a local elementary school? Could you teach a Sunday school class or take someone out for coffee who needs your advice or listening ear? There are endless possibilities out there. The wonderful thing about investing your time in others is you too are incredibly blessed in the process as well. It doesn't get much better than that, does it? So what can you do to invest in others today? There are so many options. Don't hesitate. Investing in others is one of the greatest investments out there. You get such incredible returns on your investments as well. One is the blessing of knowing you truly changed someone's life in a big or small way and that my friends makes it ALL worth it! Until next time, Dana Matthew 10:42: And if you give even a cup of cold water to one of the least of my followers, you will surely be rewarded. Little Lesson Learned: Whatever you have to offer others, know that it can be used in powerful life-changing ways if you are open to it.
Tags: helping others, investing in others, least of these, gift of time, words of affirmation, volunteer, acts of kindness, change your worldCopyright: © 2024 littlelessonslearnedbydana, 2nd edition, 2014 first edition
(Dana Romualdi) Dana Romualdi, the copyright holder reserves all rights to the content on the blog and website Little Lessons Learned by Dana, including the right to reproduce, distribute, and display the content. No content or photographs may be reproduced or modified. Blogs may be shared on social media platforms in their entirety only with full credit given to the owner. Any photographs used by other photographers are used with permission and are also protected. All Rights Reserved. |
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