No Cape Required

With Mother’s Day just behind us, I find myself reflecting on my own motherhood journey. I remember the day I became a mom like it was yesterday. After nine longs months of pregnancy, two days of labour and an emergency C-section, the much coveted title of “Mom,” was finally mine. To say I was proud was an understatement. Throughout my pregnancy, I rocked and sang to my baby songs of love and devotion, but when I held my son for the first time, I was utterly speechless. The awe and wonder of it all was completely overwhelming. I tried to sing to him, but would always cry. It was almost impossible to believe that this perfect little human being was "mine." So many mixed emotions were going on inside of me. I remember the feelings of being fiercely protective of him, and the scary feelings of inadequacy I felt. Anxious questions plagued my thoughts like: What if I mess this motherhood thing up? What if I make a mistake? Why are they letting me leave the hospital when I don’t know what I am doing? The questions went on and on. Well I did mess this motherhood thing up at times and I made plenty of mistakes along the way but Tyler and Shannon are alive and well, so I must have done something right in the end.

I was raised by a very loving and involved mom. She loved my dad, her kids and others all around her with fierce devotion. She lived out a life dedicated to others and still does to this day. She provided a great example for myself and my siblings of all that a mother should be, and I am so grateful and blessed to call her mom. I recall many late night chats about serious concerns, boys that broke my heart, or life changing decisions that needed to be made. My mom was at the center of those conversations with a listening ear, great wisdom and heartfelt prayer. She would wipe her eyes with her tea towel as we would talk of our heartaches and struggles and it showed me how bonded we were. When we hurt, she hurt. When we rejoiced, she did too. That’s what a mother does and she did it well. Thank you Mom!

It is funny that the most important job in the world is not often valued and is entered into with literally no training other than  “on the job” in most cases.  When my children were little my husband and I sacrificed and I stayed home with them. I will always cherish that time, yet it was also one of the hardest things I have ever done. Many days were challenging. I felt unprofessional, frustrated, unappreciated, bored and stressed. I swore if one more little person came to me with a messy diaper or runny nose, I was out of here. But then there were the amazing days and yes there were many. I would look around and see two of the most brilliant, special, creative, funny and cherished little people by my side and I would want to pinch myself that I had the pleasure of spending my days with them. I heard a quote this week about motherhood that said “The days are long, but the years are short.” This is very true indeed. Many times in conversations at that time I felt undervalued when people heard I was a stay at home mom. That is O.K. though, because I knew I was doing the most important job in the world and I was proud of myself.

Let me dispel the myth everyone. There are no supermoms out there. All moms have good days and bad days. Sometimes the day runs smoothly, the kids are happy and engaged and the aroma of a home cooked meal fills the tidy house. Other days our homes can feel like an episode of Hoarders and it is cereal for supper … again! As far as the cereal for supper thing goes I have a friend that I have met through Facebook who I greatly admire. She has done extremely well with a new business that she has started, is raising two amazing girls, has an extreme passion for helping people and  making a difference and seems to really have this motherhood thing down. One night on Facebook she posted “It’s cereal for supper people! Tell me I’m not alone!” This friend has always been very open and honest about her struggles, victories and life journey in general and that comment just made me appreciate her all the more. It was funny the chain of people who commented on her thread as we have all been there. There are no super moms, just super ladies who are doing the best they can day after day. There is no cape required, but other attributes are necessary. They include: honesty, a sense of humor, expert problem solving skills, money management abilities, a listening ear, creativity, flexibility, wisdom and an open and tender heart. We don’t have to be “Supermom,” just the most super mom we can be in our own little household.

The Bible says I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. All things means motherhood too ladies. Some seasons of motherhood are definitely harder than others, but we have God by our side and each other. Seasons change. Problems pass and children grow up. Let’s work to see the big picture and strive to be the best examples of moms for our kids we can be. Making mistakes is inevitable, but being honest with our kids about our shortcomings is powerful too. Being real with them shows them that even moms have good days and bad days and that is crucial for them to see. It is not about the destination, but the journey. God bless you all on this crazy, yet amazing ride we call motherhood. I went to a baby shower this week and the advice I gave the new mom is very simple I told her to enjoy every minute because kids grow way too fast! I know that is cliché, but it so true. Mine are nineteen and seventeen and it is unbelievable. So moms take a deep breath and one day at a time. You got this and remember that being a mom is one of the most amazing experiences you will ever have, so in between all the ups and downs,  please, please don’t forget to enjoy it.

~ Until next time

Dana

Philippians 4:13 ~ I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

Little Lesson Learned: What an honour to be someone’s mom. Don’t forget that!